Archives for category: Opinion

image

 

Have you heard the phrase “polite society”? What does it mean to you? No really. What do YOU think it means?

It’s an important question to answer. Why? Because what you consider polite society to be determines how you act in society. For instance, if you think people should be gracious and courteous, you will likely allow someone to get in line in front of you at the grocery store when they have one item and you have a cart full.

However, if you think it means everything should run in an orderly fashion, you make that person with one item stand behind you because you got there first.

Which one is right? Which one is more polite?

I’m in the former group and get really irritated when I encounter someone in the latter group. Does that make me right or wrong?

You see, we’ve thrown around this phrase of polite society without truly thinking about what it really means. Truth is, we all have an image of what makes society livable.

And yet, I believe there are some basics we can all agree on.

Using please and thank you. Smiling at someone when you look at them. Opening a door, or holding it open, for someone coming through at the same time. Listening when a friend needs an ear. A personal one of mine, adhering to the right of way at a four way stop sign.

But what about those situations where it could go in a couple different ways? Well, that’s when we need to have grace. Grace to acknowledge the other persons actions as not rude. Grace to consider looking at things a different way. Grace to offer forgiveness when we encounter truly rude people.

Grace is what we’ve truly lost. We get so wrapped up in our version of polite society that we forget that we don’t make the rules. We are not Miss Manners. We are not Emily Post. We are not Dear Abby. We are human…and so is everyone else.

Everyone is just trying to navigate to world as carefully as possible, and we all make mistakes. How are you doing at allowing others to make mistakes? How are you doing at acknowledging your own mistakes?

There will never be a wholly polite society. The sooner we get comfortable with that idea, the sooner we can start treating each other with grace and civility.

image

 

Last night, Las Vegas played host to the Johnson/Weld campaign. I was fortunate enough to attend the rally at The Foundry inside the SLS hotel and casino.

This election has been chaotic and is led by two frontrunners, Clinton and Trump, many people are not that excited for. Enter the Libertarian ticket of Gary Johnson and Bill Weld.

Both men are former Republican Governors in predominately liberal states. Gary Johnson was a two term Governor for New Mexico and Bill Weld a two term Governor for Massachusetts. They bring to the race a dual message of fiscal responsibility and social liberty.

While their message is one of freedom, historically the Libertarian ticket has not faired well in the political world. At least up until now. This particular election has grown the Libertarian base in big ways.

For instance, the Johnson/Weld campaign has raised more money in the first two weeks of August than Johnson raised for his whole campaign in 2012. Gary Johnson and Bill Weld are starting to become less obscure candidates and more household name candidates. Most importantly, they are poised to take the stage for the Presidential Debates for the first time…ever.

Pretty impressive for laid back guys that show up in jeans to a campaign rally held in a nightclub!

image

Don’t let that laid back exterior fool you! Both men lowered taxes in their respective states during their tenures as Governors. Both men are insistent that, were they to be elected, they would send over a balanced and scaled back budget within their first hundred days in office. And that fiscal sense sets them apart from Clinton and Trump.

Aside from balancing budgets, both men laid out a platform of reduced government, reduced taxes, greater trade deals, opening truly free markets, immigration reform, and supporting the second amendment alongside opening discussions about screening for mental health issues and potential terroristic issues.

While they need to streamline answers to certain questions on religious freedom in business and use of Executive Orders, they are very clear about what a truly Libertarian presidency would look like; describing it as true bipartisanship throughout by having people from all political spectrums in their cabinet.

Their strength is in promoting free markets. Gary Johnson, a very successful businessman, is aware of the struggles that career carries. As a result, he is passionate about getting government out of business saying “Uber all the things! Take the middleman out of the equation!” and “Free market is devoid of government interference.”

This may be the year for the Libertarian ticket! Bill Weld summed it up well saying “When going into the last month before an election and you have the choice of money, organization, and momentum; You. Want. MOMENTUM!!” Hearing them speak live really gives a much better sense of their excitement, passion, and that amazing momentum.

image

image

Dear Quentin Tarantino,

Recently you participated in a #BlackLivesMatter event in NYC and declared police officers to be murderers. This, despite the fact that the city had seen 4 NYPD officers executed while on duty in the last few months; one just days prior to the event and your comments.

Now, I would never stop you from using your first amendment right to free speech. In fact, I love hearing what people really think as it helps me decide who is worthy of my admiration or who I should ignore. Your comments put you in the latter category. Yes, I understand the irony of this post considering that analysis, but this will be the last time I care about what you do.

I am a LEO wife. I send my husband to work everyday and pray he comes home. My kids and I forgo having daddy home on holidays, weekends, and special events. My husband gives up sleep to be a part of Christmas mornings (he works graveyard) or to help me with carpooling duties. He provides well for our family, both monetarily and in a leadership role.

And you call him a murderer.

My husband has never been involved in an OIS, nor has he killed anyone for any reason by any method. He’s been assaulted, spit on, had feces thrown at him, called a racist, and sneered at regularly.

And you call him a murderer.

My husband is my best friend, partner, lover, support, and provider. I can not imagine life without him.

And you call him a murderer, and support a group that actively supports the slaughter of officers.

Now, you can say all you want about “Of course I wasn’t talking about YOUR husband. Just cops in general.”, but cops in general IS my husband. It is also his coworkers, my friends husbands, my sister in law, brother in law, and countless neighbors. So your comments matter.

They matter because you have clout. It is earned clout too! You have made some of the most iconic movies ever. The insight you have into your various characters is nothing short of astounding, yet you aren’t using that discernment when it comes to our officers.

No, you prefer to call them murderers and support the people who want to murder cops. We call that irony. Sick, twisted, irony.

I implore you to look at the facts about police brutality and the mindset of those in the #BlackLivesMatter crowd. If, after researching all that with an open mind, you still believe that all cops are murderers, I will pray for your heart to soften toward all the officers in my life who have never taken a life; and God willing, never will have to.

Sincerely,
An LEO wife

image

Rage. That is my predominate emotion lately. Rage at those who call for the execution of officers. Rage at those who carry out that call. Rage at those who cheer gleefully when they hear of an officer being cut down.

No officer is safe because these animals don’t care about who they kill, just THAT they kill someone wearing the uniform.

It never occurs to them that the man they see die has a wife at home tucking their children into bed, telling them daddy will be home in the morning. The mother lies to her children unknowingly.

These deranged souls don’t see the 2 am knock on the door, where the wife sees her husbands Captain, her pastor and a representative from the mental care side of policing. They don’t see her knees buckle even before anyone says a word.

They don’t have to explain to a four year old why daddy is never coming home again.

No, all they do is pull a trigger over and over again.

I pray daily, hourly in fact, that my husband is safe. That he comes home and kisses me again. That the kids get to say “Daddy! Watch this!” just one more time. Every time he leaves for work I wonder if it will be the last. But I can’t dwell on that because kids have homework to do, showers to take and dinner to eat.

What is the focus of these sick demented people? It is singular. Kill.

My rage builds with each officer I hear about. And I have nowhere to put that rage. So I push it down, way far down, and I cry. I pray. I donate when and where I can to the constant stream of sites.

And I secretly wait for husband to call, text, or come home before I can breathe again. Because then I at least have one more day, one more kiss, one more time to tell him how much I love him. And then he leaves for work again.

If you’re reading this and you have supported the Black Lives Matter crowd, or silently cheered when you hear of another officer gunned down, or are planning to kill an officer, know that I am praying for your heart to be softened. That’s all I can do for you. Because you hate me and my husband without knowing us, anything I might say to you will fall on deaf ears.

To those officers out there, trying to protect us all, know that you are covered in prayer as well. And should the unthinkable happen, know that we will not rest until justice prevails. Because we ARE family.

image

Tonight I saw a friend’s Facebook post where she used the phrase “A servants heart” and it got me thinking. In what ways am I showing a servants heart?

There’s the obvious answers of taking care of my family and friends, but those are things we should all be doing no matter what. No, a true servants heart goes deeper.

The key, I believe, is in being sacrificial. No, not actual sacrifices like at an altar; sacrifices of your wants to take care of others needs.

image

When was the last time any of us actually did this? Moreover, did it with a truly joyful heart? See, the sacrifice loses its meaning if you dwell on its loss. Giving up your seat on the bus, but then complaining how much your back now hurts isn’t showing a true servants heart.

I thought about this tonight because I am in the midst of being sacrificial for the benefit of others. The trouble is, I keep dwelling on the time I am missing with my husband, the wine I am not able to have right now and the sleep I am foregoing, but desperately needing. Why?

I am truly happy to help. I didn’t bat an eyelash when asked. It wasn’t even a QUESTION in my mind to say yes! And yet…

So how can I follow through this entire sacrifice with a servants heart? Number one, I need to get over myself. The whole point of me being here, instead of home, is so a husband CAN be there for his wife; so the children have normalcy in a chaotic time for them. And I want wine??? Please.

Number two, I need to lean more on Gods desire for my actions than my own. Only He knows what is best for me right now, and if He didn’t want/need me right here, right now, I would not be here. His plan is so much greater than the one I could conceive.

Number three, I need to relax. So I lose a little sleep! So I save my liver a night of intense filtering! So I see my family for a few less hours! It’s minor. Those things are fleeting, but the time I gave to this family is everything to them!

Is my servants heart restored? Mostly. I am human after all. I still want my version of tonight, but I am much happier to give it up to help those who truly need it. And that…that is the bottom line.

Don’t beat yourself up for wishing you didn’t have to be sacrificial. Just try to change the lamenting to fond wistfulness!

image

image

Nearly 15 years ago I became a mom. There’s a lot the books don’t prepare you for. One of those items is breastfeeding in public. It’s going to happen. That bundle of joy needs food almost all the time. So inevitably you will be grocery shopping, or out to eat, or at your older child’s soccer practice and your new baby turns into Audrey 2 from “Little Shop of Horrors” screaming “FEEED MEEEEEEEE!!!!!!”

What’s a mom to do?

Lately, a movement has taken hold that is promoting breastfeeding awareness. There’s even a hashtag of normalizebreastfeeding. I never knew people considered breastfeeding abnormal. What this new movement is trying to establish is that one does not need to cover up while breastfeeding because the act is a natural and necessary part of life. That baby needs to eat, so it’s no big deal for a woman to expose her breast to whomever is nearby.

As a mom of three, who had to breastfeed in public on multiple occasions, if find this line of thinking weird. Not because I am embarrassed about the fact that a baby needs to feed, not even because I object to nudity. No, I object to this stance because I don’t want my teenage son, who’s going through puberty, to see boobs when he’s at lacrosse practice, or the library, or while we’re out to eat.

These moms that feel they don’t need to cover up must have husbands that don’t mind sharing their wives bodies with just anyone. Hear me out. Husband and wife are connected to one another by various means, but the most intimate is that they know every curve, inch, imperfection, line, dimple, and shade of each other’s bodies. That is a beautiful thing!! Why would any husband be ok with the random person at the food court getting to see that which is only meant for him?

Yes, breastfeeding is natural and necessary. However, so is going to the bathroom, sex, and bathing. I assume the moms who feel it’s ok to whip out the boob, are less likely to say they would go to the bathroom while everyone watched. I am nearly positive none of those moms would find having sex with their husbands a public matter. Bathing? Well, hey, who knows where the line is drawn?

My point is this: yes, breastfeeding is natural. Yes, it is necessary. Yes, it is going to happen in public. Still, there is no credible reason why a mom can’t use a cover up for privacy sake. Some of the ones now are really cool! They tie around your neck and have a wire loop so you can keep an eye on baby. The material is lightweight and comes in all kinds of patterns and designs.image

Ladies, take pride in showing off your baby, not your boobies! Keep your body sacred for your husband. You can nourish your child in public without exposing yourself. I did it with my three, and not because I am a prude, or embarrassed about my body. I covered up because no one asked to see my boobs, and I am not one to share something if no one asked for it.